...this is how I feel right now. I feel so close, yet so far from meeting our little girl that the days just seem to go on and on without ever feeling like we are getting any closer. I know it is right around the corner, but still...I havent packed our hospital bags yet or an overnight bag for Gavin and I am completely unmotivated to wash our baby girls clothes...I think I am in a little bit of denial, if that makes sense. Gavin has been in the best mood these past couple of days...every time he cuddles with me or does something sweet...I think to myself...will he still be this sweet little boy? Am I going to completely ruin all the work we put into him in terms of discipline, routines, yada yada yada. Dont get me wrong, we can not wait to bring this little girl into the world and feel so blessed to be able to expand our family, but I am not going to lie...I am getting more and more freaked out as each day passes. Anyways, this is the biggest reason why I want to go into labor on my own...if I were to be induced...I dont think I could handle the anticipation...I would love the surprise that going into labor on my own would bring. I would not have time to really think about all my fears...I would just have to buck up and get to the hospital! Anyways, just a little thought of mine for the day. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow and Iam pretty sure I will be check for progress...cross your fingers there is something to show for!!
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